


You lost your number? Have mine instead.

by horrifiedmoonbeam



Category: Fortnite (Video Game), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Canon Compliant, Crack Treated Seriously, Gen, Gun Violence, M/M, Marauders (Fortnite), Memory Loss, Oblivious Thor (Marvel), Pining, Robots, and 4, deo is a simp, everybody thinks thor is hot, except siona, fortnite chapter 2 season 3, in which we are all deo, k i t, misty meadows, salty springs, shes just confused, siona has the braincell, siona wants to yeet herself into space, weeping woods, you lost your number?? oh have mine instead
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2020-09-21
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:47:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26576278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/horrifiedmoonbeam/pseuds/horrifiedmoonbeam
Summary: “Ah, good morning, strange people,” he spoke with a heavy accent. He looked around, at the muted red walls of the room, the counter full of various fruits, and then finally at the revolver held tightly in Siona’s hand. “And who might you be?”“You tell us,” Siona shot back quickly. “You’re the one who fell out of the sky.”“But like also, are you hurt? Do you need me to check for any injuries??” Deo cut in, a smile forming on his face. Siona shot a look at him.“Did I? That’s strange. As far as I know, people don’t do that,” he replied.“Well, I mean, they do, but out of a bus, not the actual sky,”  YellowJacket said. The man narrowed his eyes.“...Okay. well, since I seemed to have encroached on your lives without prior warning, I shall introduce myself. I am...” he trailed off, a hand hovering over his chest. “Uh, that’s strange.”“What?” Deo asked.“I can’t seem to... remember my name.”
Relationships: Deo & Thor (Fortnite), Deo/Thor (Fortnite), Siona & Deo (Fortnite), Siona & Thor (Fortnite)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 7





	You lost your number? Have mine instead.

**Author's Note:**

> this is the first fanfiction i've ever posted.  
> my descent into hell will be slow and painful.  
> the volume inside of this battle bus is ASTRONOMICAL (by travis scott).

Snow crunched underneath the metal soles of Siona’s boots as she trudged up Mount F8, her eyes trained warily on the gigantic bright purple crack in the sky. Because the last thing they needed were more marauders right now. they were a pain in the ass to deal with, and as if Fade’s oni mask wasn’t weird enough, the marauders wore wolf masks that looked like they had been hastily cut out of paper. Kit could have honestly done a better job making them, and he didn’t even have opposable thumbs (and Siona wasn’t sure if the mech Jules built for him could work with the level of precision or craftsmanship required to create a structure that could resemble a mask.)

Did Kit even understand what a mask was in the first place? He was a cat after all. He could operate a charge shotgun, she supposed, but he didn’t speak. 

“You seem very... pensive, Si” Deo’s voice cut in through her headset. They both had the helmets of their suits up to block out the cold, so they communicated through the radio feed. Deo mostly made obscene fart noises at strange times, though, that annoyed the ever-loving fuck out of her. “Whatcha thinking about?” 

“Uh, nothing. just stupid shit,” she replied, shaking the thought out of her head. She supposed she would test out the theory the next time she visited Catty Corner. Not that she went there very often. It smelled like litter and motor oil most of the time, the former of which is not a pleasant smell in the slightest. The latter was one she was accustomed to with her trips off-planet. E-fuel smelled similar enough. But the combination of the two fumes created a chemical that Siona was convinced was radioactive, or at least toxic. 

In other words, she was more of a dog person. 

The peak of Mount F8 was a pleasant area, isolated from the usual bustle of the island. It brought her closer to space, for one, which held a certain level of quiet she never experienced anymore. Between the two warring agencies and the aftermath of the Device, Siona found solace in the quiet the mountain offered. Which is why she brought Deo with her. Having landed later than her on the island, he was hit harder by the stark aftermath of Midas's doomsday device (or, the aftermath of its failure). he had not been present for much of the reign of Ghost. 

Siona had come just before the end. before Midas set off the device. Before it failed. 

Before two-thirds of the island became flooded in fucking _water_.

Ghost didn’t really exist anymore. There was Ocean at the Fortilla, picking up the pieces of her mentor’s work. Siona had run into her once or twice, but most of her attention had been spent on the rise of Shadow. The Authority. 

Jules. 

And Kit, she supposed.

Fucking Kit. 

Deo stretched out on the ground, his broad shoulders sinking into the plush snow. His reaction to the events of the past few months was calmer than she expected. The last thing he witnessed was the final blueprints of the device and his pining over Brutus at the Grotto. Then Brutus died, and Midas... also? died. And Jonesy just simply did not possess the muscular physique that piqued her brother’s interest. 

It was stormier than usual, even with the fervent weather the island normally experienced. It also notably did not possess the violet hue usually associated with said storms. Siona thought it might snow, but no rain actually fell. The sensors in her suit actually indicated that it was quite dry outside, given that they were on snow. That was certainly new. 

“Did you hear about the stupid shadow dinner happening today?” Deo asked, not moving from his reclined position. “Jules is making salad.” 

“I suppose Frenzy’s getting a lot of irrigation with all this water. I swear to god all she eats is salad now.”

“Is it any good?” 

“No!” Siona scoffed. “The girl can build pretty fucking great robots, I’ll give her that. But Gordon Ramsey would literally fry her ass if he ever tasted her fucking salad.” 

A pause. 

“I found a mini cog in my food last time...” Siona added, and Deo practically howled with laughter. 

And, at the same time, lightning struck the earth. 

Both twins shot up, gazing at the site of the strike. It was on the peak opposite them, and in its wake left scorch marks and a rock formation? Siona leaned forward, holding the scope of her sniper up to her eye. It was laid out in a semicircle, right above one of the ski camps. Siona leaned back, staring at her brother with wide eyes. 

“Okay, what the fuck.” That one was certainly new, and seemingly unprovoked. This wasn’t Midas and some sort of doomsday device, this was just... the sky. 

“Should we... go check it out?” Deo hesitantly stood up, offering his hand to help Siona. She took it but shook her head. 

“I don’t know, man. I know better than to question the weird shit that happens in this place.” She supposed weirder things may have happened, but it didn’t stop the curiosity that peeked behind her rejection. 

As if the universe were still reading her mind, the sky began to swirl. slowly, at first, then rapidly, spiraling down towards the ground above the woods. A tornado, Siona realized, panic seizing her. Deo grabbed her hand and pulled her back to the other side of the mountain, trying to get a land formation between them and the storm. 

“What the fuck, what the _fuck_ ,” he chanted as the sky erupted in color. Vertical spikes of light began to shoot towards the ground. Siona pulled away from her brother and raised her sniper up again. It was hard to see from the distance alone, but she could’ve almost sworn she saw a person falling in the eye of the storm. 

Then, all at once, it was gone, leaving literally no damage in its wake. Siona looked to her brother, then took off down the mountain towards the car they had driven to the base. Deo shouted after her before running to catch up with her. 

“What the fuck are you doing?” he shouted, making Siona wince from the feedback on the radio.

“‘Checking it out.’” 

*****

There was a man in the crop circle. 

Could it even be considered a crop circle? It was more burned into the soil, just above the western lodge of Weeping Woods. Tracing strange geometric patterns almost reminiscent of a summoning circle. 

But that was beside the point.

What Siona was more concerned about was the literal man unconscious in the center. He had long blond hair and wore some strange armor and a cloak that reflected the stars. Siona and Deo stared at him in shock. 

“You’re sure this whole ass person fell from the sky?” Deo glanced sideways at her. 

“Yes! It isn’t so crazy. If marauders can do it, so can blondie over here.” Siona crouched next to the man and removed a glove to check his pulse. She had shed her spacesuit in favor of shorts and a shirt to better suit the temperature change. 

He was alive, at least. A weird energy pulsed through her fingers as she touched his neck. There was something strange about this man, besides the fact that he had just fallen out of the sky. He wasn’t supposed to be here. 

“What should we do with him?” Deo poked the man’s leg with his boot, and Siona swatted it away angrily. 

“Stop that. We can’t just leave the guy here. Let’s take him back home.” She stood up and reached under the guy’s arms, slinging him over her shoulder and hauling him into the back of the truck. They sped off towards Misty Meadows, and Siona eyed the man warily again, wondering just what was gonna come to the island besides this strange, muscular man. 

*****

“You sure he isn’t dead?” YellowJacket leaned over the sleeping figure lounged out on the bed, her eyebrows furrowed. “And why the hell is he so _jacked_?” 

“Ugh, I know,” Deo sighed. “It should be a crime to have that much muscle.”

Siona rolled her eyes. As much as she appreciated Yellow’s company, she could have been spared listening to her and her brother’s constant pining over this stranger’s body. Especially since they had no idea who he was. 

After another lighting strike and a frantic call from Jules, Siona learned of another weird product of the storm: a giant crater blasted into the grass near salty springs, in the center of it what seemed to be a hammer of some sort. No one had been able to lift it, which reminded Siona of something one of those strange superhero-types had said once during one of Midas’s parties. They told weird stories, those superheroes, and while they might not have been completely outside the realms of possibility they certainly never happened here. An unliftable hammer, for one, was at a level of obscureness that rivaled llama pinatas filled with bullets and stone bricks. 

Perhaps not.

In any case, this starry-caped stranger had not come alone, and Siona didn’t know how to process that information. 

“Ok, focus, you two,” Siona turned to the pair, “This man fell from the sky, with some heavy ass building tool. We... just have to ask him why he’s here.”

Siona stepped up to the bed where he lay and, despite her better judgment, poked the man. 

“How can he answer if he’s dead though,” YellowJacket asked. Siona sighed, continuing to jab the man with her finger. 

“He’s not deaD-” Siona jumped back as the man began to stir, her hand hovering over the revolver on her belt. The three sat in silence as the man stood up and stretched out, letting out a hefty yawn. 

For whatever reason, he hadn’t noticed his surroundings yet, or the three significantly smaller humans watching with varying levels of curiosity and horror. He inhaled slowly, pursing his lips together, and groggily swung his legs over the edge of the bed. 

Only then did he notice them, and he blinked slowly before smiling, the edges of his eyes creasing. 

“Ah, good morning, strange people,” he spoke with a heavy accent. He looked around, at the muted red walls of the room, the counter full of various fruits, and then finally at the revolver held tightly in Siona’s hand. “And who might you be?”

“You tell us,” Siona shot back quickly. “You’re the one who fell out of the sky.”

“But like also, are you hurt? Do you need me to check for any injuries??” Deo cut in, a smile forming on his face. Siona shot a look at him. 

“Did I? That’s strange. As far as I know, people don’t do that,” he replied.

“Well, I mean, they do, but out of a bus, not the actual sky,” YellowJacket said. The man narrowed his eyes. 

“...Okay. well, since I seemed to have encroached on your lives without prior warning, I shall introduce myself. I am...” he trailed off, a hand hovering over his chest. “Uh, that’s strange.”

“What?” Deo asked. 

“I can’t seem to... remember my name,” he said silently, standing up. He was MUCH taller than any of them were by a good few inches. Siona could tell that Deo was practically salivating at this point. He was eyeing this nameless man the way Jules eyed a project blueprint or Kit ( _K i t_ ) eyed a blue flopper. Her brother was a hopeless romantic. 

“You don’t... remember your name? Okay...” YellowJacket frowned, stepping closer to the man. “I wonder if that has anything to do with the storm you fell during. Maybe you got struck by lightning or something.”

“Does lightning do that?” Deo furrowed his eyebrows. “I thought it just killed you. Or... depleted your energy a bunch UNTIL it killed you.”

“Hell if I know,” YellowJacket replied. “I mean he also fell, like, a lot, so he could have also just hit his head.”

The man looked thoughtful while Deo and YellowJacket talked, but Siona noticed him perk up slightly at the mention of lightning. He muttered something under his breath, staring at the ground. His eyes were a piercing blue, not uncommon but there was a certain way they glowed that seemed almost ethereal. Otherworldly, almost. 

“I’m not sure about that, but I think... I lost something.” The man cut in. “Something important.”

“Yeah, your memories.” YellowJacket replied, at the same time Deo breathed, “Your number, take mine instead.” 

“A hammer?” Siona said, after processing what the other two had said and promptly hitting her brother upside the head. Luckily for him, the man didn’t seem to have heard his comment. “My friend called and said there was some giant hammer nearby.”

“Yes! Yes, that sounds right. Where is this hammer?”

*****

“Alright, Lightning McQueen, apparently no ones been able to lift this thing, so let’s see if you can,” Siona smirked as the man stepped to the edge of the giant crater. They eyed the thing in the center; it didn’t look like a hammer in the conventional sense. It was more like a giant version of something used for blacksmithing... or whack a mole. A giant, hella heavy whack a mole mallet. 

Deo and Siona stayed behind as he slid down towards it. He stared at it for a bit, then knelt down, clasping his hands on the handle. despite herself, Siona held her breath. she couldn’t figure out what was so mesmerizing about this scene. She knew Deo would just like to see the flex of the man’s muscles as he lifted the hammer, but she didn’t particularly care for the spectacle. Curiosity, probably. answers. 

She didn’t get to finish the thought before red light filled her vision, and she heard a scream. 

Siona’s senses were overwhelmed for a moment, and she couldn’t feel anything. She could vaguely tell that she was on the grass, but it took her a moment to orient herself. The air smelled like smoke and melting plastic. She recovered her vision just in time to roll away from a red beam heading towards her. 

Deo was on the ground, coughing his guts out. His back was smoking, and he reached behind him to equip his assault rifle. Panic rose in her. He looked relatively okay, but she hoped the blast wasn’t too serious. 

She took out the revolver and looked around frantically for the source of the attack. She thought for a moment that it was the RPG of a marauder and that the red light was from a comet, but what she found instead was a huge fucking robot.

It towered above them. Spires of black pointing into the sky, looking almost like a molecule Siona had seen once on Jules’s laptops during her genetic experiments. On what she assumed to be its head, a red light moved around to look at her and Deo. Two smaller versions of it soared towards them through the air. 

She aimed and shot one square in the center, and it fell to the ground in front of her. For a moment she stared at it, watching the lights flash frantically and the circuits spark.

Then she realized it was going to explode, and she jumped back. 

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Deo do the same, firing at the giant bot in the center. It was sparking angrily now, shooting thick red beams at the two of them. One nicked Siona’s shoulder, and pain seared through her body. She returned it with a few shots to the eye. 

But nothing seemed to phase it. It stood, just as tall as ever, shitting out endless streams of small drones and shooting at the two. Siona and Deo were starting to tire; more than once now she had just barely dodged a fatal beam. Sweat beaded on the side of her face, and her buns were starting to come undone. 

Was she really about to be killed by a fucking molecule?

The answer came in the form of lightning. A bolt of it emerged from the... cloudless sky and struck the robot dead in the middle. It sparked frantically, and Siona ran to Deo and manifested a wall in front of them before it exploded. Something soared through the air and landed dead in the center, and then everything erupted in light. 

Siona paused for a moment, then dared to peek around the wall. 

The man stood in a pile of rubble, his eyes sparkling and his skin glowing blue, the hammer clutched in his hand. He turned towards them, and Siona gaped, almost expecting him to blow them up next. But instead, he smiled, and waved the hammer at them in greeting, starting towards them.

So much for a whack a mole mallet. 

“Okay, what the fuck, blondie,” Siona said, rubbing her shoulder in pain. Deo stretched out, his eyes wide with wonder. 

“Dude, that was so. Fucking. Cool. Holy shit,” he mused, and Siona once again sighed and mentally made a note to call him out for being a simp later. “Can I... touch your hammer?” 

Siona wished the molecule bot had killed her.

“Are you two okay???” he said in a high pitched voice, his eyes wide. Deo chuckled dumbly, tucking a fallen strand of hair from his man bun behind his ear (Debbie Ryan style). 

“Yeah. yeah, we’re good. that was... wow.” He was dumbstruck. If there was anything Deo liked more than a muscular man it was a muscular man with power. 

Deo was definitely a bottom. 

Siona shuddered, desperately trying to rid her mind of the thought. The last thing she needed to be doing was thinking about her brother’s constant oversharing of his sexual desires, a product of his lack of companionship (or that his friends keep disappearing or dying every few months under mysterious circumstances) that he ultimately assigned unto her. 

“What the fuck was that thing?” she asked, staring at the remains of the robot. The man sighed.

“I wonder if it is a product of space, perhaps a byproduct of my brother’s chaos.” The man rubbed his chin in thought. Siona paused. 

“Your...brother?”

“Yeah... oH right I remember who I am.” The man puffed out his chest gallantly and raised his hammer. 

“I am Thor Odinson. God of Thunder, King of Asgard... I don’t remember much more than that.” he trailed off, lowering his arm. “But I know that much!” 

“Oh he’s a god too,” Deo whispered to his sister. She sighed again. 

“Ok... sounds fake but we’ll go with that.” Siona deadpanned. Thor looked at her agape. 

“Do you... do you not know who I am?” 

“I mean, the closest thing we have to a god here is the vbucks scam bear, and she’s absolutely feral. But I mean, I thought you would look... different.” 

“How so?”

“Well, that weird vibrant superhero guy said you looked... I don’t know. You’re just not what I pictured when he described you.”

“Who... is this ‘vibrant superhero man’ you speak of?” Siona narrowed her eyes. She vaguely remembered him coming to one of Jules’s dinners; he was the friend of a friend of her father’s. He was clad in red, white, and blue, and spoke in the kind of tone that Siona instantly disliked. He told stories of groups and agencies not unlike Ghost or Shadow, but somehow stranger. It greatly confused her. 

“I don’t remember his name, but had some sort of really small shield with a star on it he was sorta obsessed with.”

Thor ruminated over this for a moment, muttering something under his breath that sounded almost like "fucking Steve," then shrugged. “Guess I don’t know him. Anyway, we should see what we can about the robot.” 

The group walked over and began to pick up the remains of the robot. Siona turned a metal shard over in her hand, running her fingers over the patterns on it. She picked up something else and frowned. Engraved on the back of the head was a symbol of some sort; a circle, with strange spirals on it, similar yet widely different from the crop circle that brought Thor to the island. She stood up and tapped him on the shoulder, straining a bit since he was so fucking tall. 

“Do you recognize this?” He frowned, taking it from her gently. 

“No, I don’t.” his brow furrowed, a disturbed look washing over his face. “But I have a bad feeling about this.”

“Like, a ‘Kit got out of the workshop and is eating all the agent’s food bad,’ or a ‘Midas is planning the end of the world bad?’” Siona asked, trying not to get salty over the existence of that goddamn cat again. 

“I have... no idea who either of those people is, but I would say the latter.”

“Shit.”

“In any case, I think we might need help to deal with this. Heimdall!!”

Deo piped up, “What... sort of help-”

Thor raised his hammer, and lightning struck the sky. For a moment, nothing happened, then the same spirally clouds Siona had seen from the mountain began to gather, twisting faster and faster. The wind started to pick up, and Siona tried to get the loose hair out of her face.

Her vision filled with rainbow light, brilliant and terrifying. 

When it cleared, they were no longer alone. Six more people had joined them, all scattered in their own respective crop circles. Siona stared in mild shock, then backed up as the figures began to rise, lifting her revolver again. She tried to make sense of everyone, of the green muscular lady and the man with long-clawed gloves and the giant? tree? person???

Siona should have known better than to be surprised. 

The one in front, clad in a vibrant copper and gold iron suit, regarded the trio with mild confusion. 

“Who the fuck are all of you?”


End file.
